Auto-fail Blog

2011 Charger

Josh — Fri, 13 May 2011 18:24:42 +0000

The previous generation was just two marks away from a fail. Saved only by the SRT8 which was decently fast and looked pretty mean. Calling a family sedan a Charger was a pretty big offense but they made up for it with an aggressive looking hemi packing monster.

The new Charger looks like the inbred bastard child of a Ram and a Challenger. Loosing it’s point for looks and thus becoming fail. I have to say Dodge had a good chance here but flopped. I imagine the current design was lobbied as a joke and some high on crack upper management said “no, I like it”.

Sorry for the inactivity.

Josh — Thu, 12 May 2011 18:29:55 +0000

Thank you for all of you that posted replys and commments. I’ll be picking back up soon.

Third Gen Lightning

Josh — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 21:12:31 +0000

This was an awesome idea from Ford. The Third Generation Lightning. The sport truck scene was abuzz with rumors of 500hp s/c V8s likened to that of the GT500. The concept truck looked nice enough and there was plenty of people willing to purchase one. Including myself. So the question is why in the hell did Ford/SVT scrap this awesome, much anticipated project? Who will ever know. But this will surely go down as a fail on Ford’s part for not bestowing this beast upon the masses.

Third Gen Lightning

Dodge Ram SRT-10

Josh — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 21:57:37 +0000

This is the first truck to make my blog and it does so for one very simple reason: It can hardly be classified as a truck. The Dodge Ram SRT-10 was made to compete with the Ford Lightning, a task at which it fails. The SRT-10 claims to be the fastest production truck on the market. But, it simply fails at being a truck. It has no towing capacity, it’s actually frowned upon by the owners manual to tow anything. And for a full size truck a 900 lb payload capacity is laughable. The SRT-10 comes with a bumper void of trailer hitch holes whilst the lightning comes from the factory with a towing package installed and a 5000lb towing capacity and a 1500 lb payload capacity. Not to mention the MSRP of a SRT-10 was nearly $10k more during production. Mod for mod the Lightning gains more HP than the SRT-10, and is actually worthy of the title “truck”.

So the SRT-10 becomes the first truck to make the Auto-Fail Blog, if you can’t tow or haul anything you just bought a heavy ass car.

SRT-10 Ram

Kia Amanti

Josh — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 19:14:36 +0000

Though lots of car critiqs have many nice things to say about this car, I do not. I personally detest a car that blatently tries to look like another. In this case a Mercedes. And their ads forever tried to put them in the same class as BMWs and Benzes. I personally find it homorous that Hyundai-Kia has to compare it’s self to real cars to get sales. Sure a 100k mile warranty is great, but you’ll definately need that mofo when the sub-lawnmower engine rattles out of that wannabe Benz.

Totally not a Benz

1978-1983 Dodge Challenger

Josh — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:59:06 +0000

Why is it that Automakers kept reviving muscle car names on wimpy 4 banger fail-balls? The 2nd gen Dodge Challenger is one to get this honor. With a highest engine option of a 2.6L 4 cylinder, this is another vehicle that cannot live up to it’s name sake. Thankfully Dodge resurrected the Challenger to some kind of Muscle Car status with the newest models, sadly someone there is still smoking something to put the Charger name on a Sedan.

1978 Dodge Challenger

Altezzas

Josh — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 15:11:51 +0000

These horrendous additions, available for pretty much any vehicle, are the first parts/modification failures to make my blog. They don’t make any car look better, in fact they make a car look like it was designed by a chimp with downs.

Altezza Tail Lights on a Rice-box

1984-1988 Pontiac Fiero

Josh — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 21:06:38 +0000

GM’s attempt at an alternative to the gas guzzling corvette resulted in this, compact, mid engine, underpowered Lotus wannabe. For having a name which means “proud” in Italian, this car had it’s fare share of fail. Including engine fires, a shotty cooling system, and a lawsuit from Ferrari due to the appearance package offered in 1987 too closely resembling a Ferrari.

2005-Present SS Slobalt and SS HHR

Josh — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 19:44:29 +0000

These are two cars that should never have been branded with such a prestigious name as Super Sport.

SS stands for a few things, big ass V8s, high horse power, rear wheel drive, muscle cars. Neither of these automofails have any of these aspects.

Pulling up next to a sports car in an SS used to invoke fear and awe. Now it just invokes laughter and side pains.

SS HHR

1999-2002 Mercury Cougar

Josh — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 18:32:43 +0000

The Mercury Cougar was a proud car, built like a battle cruiser, with close ties to it’s cousins the Mustang and Thunderbird. It’s heritage rich in seemingly water-worthy, V8 powered, big ass cars. Until 1999…

1999, when Mercury put out a sport compact, 4 and 6 cylinder powered, bastard of a civic and a contour. Another Detroit company had befouled the name of a muscle car by putting it on a compact.